Thursday, June 28, 2012

Balancing Act

This morning I am waiting for "the call", the one that tells me it is time to go be with a family as they welcome their newest little one.  I'm crossing my fingers that today is really the day because I have one waiting in the wings and a couple other families who I'm to help postpartum.  It's making me feel like next week (or this weekend) could be the week that never ends.  I can see how easy it is for doctors to schedule births for their convenience.  These babies really need to get synced up on my Google calendar so they can get things straight, knowhutimean?

My kids came home from church Sunday night with a memory verse to practice -- Philippians 4:13 -- "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."  The kids learned it without my help, even Isaac.  On Monday morning, as I was staring at one of the papers, I checked my phone to find that the random daily Bible verse I'd been sent was also Philippians 4:13.  I felt like God was trying to prepare me for a tsunami.  

"You've got this, right, kid?"  

No, God, I don't got it!  A little help, please?!  Preferably a clone, pleaseandthankyou.

Anywho...  Last night I attended a murder mystery dinner at the Melting Pot with my good buddy Beth.  It was originally supposed to be six of us, but as the day went on, the number went down, down, down.  I'm not bitter ladies, even though I had to make the reservation-update-call-of-shame several times and I started to question my loserishness quotient.  I'm happy to say that, against all odds, Beth and I persevered, in the name of all that is cheesy goodness.  Beth got to be a loyal secretary named Trish Fish.  I stopped paying attention to most of the clues somewhere around the food showing up, so when it was time to guess the killer, everyone was guilty.  Our group got the distinguished award for "Best Worst Answer" because I couldn't be bothered to get my nose out of the fondue pot.  Guilty till proven innocent--that's the way it works, right?  

I've got this lawyer thing on lock!  Oh, yes, I do!

...I blame it on not watching enough Law & Order or something.  I feel like making that statement about L&O will probably cause me to be disowned by my grandparents.  If you know my grandparents, hush.

Currently, I'm on a self-imposed Facebook fast because.  Yes, just because.  It may or may not have had something to do with PMS.  But, also because my husband doesn't believe it's possible for me to cut back.  Also, because I'd like to hammer out my second draft by the end of July.  Why?  Because I am trying to do absolutely zero on this summer break, that's why.


It seems that having Facebook open in a tab on the side of my screen while I'm writing shouldn't be a big deal, but it is.  My eyes are drawn to it, and clickety-click, there goes my productivity.  I love my Facebook friends, I do.  It's not you, it's me.

That being said, Facebook Fast of 2012 is more like Facebook Diet of 2012.  I've had to log in once each day to check on events that were supposed to happen today and yesterday.  Seriously, I'm fasting. It just doesn't look that way if you're stalking me closely enough.  I think I've shown enormous amounts of restraint.  I mean, I've had a lot of funny status updates in my head these last couple of days.  Stuff I know you'd "like".  I'm a people-pleaser.  I like it when you "like" my stuff.  To not have anyone to give me a thumbs-up in real life is kinda a downer.  

Do I know when I will return to Facebook full-time?  No.  The husband prays it's never, but I think it's inevitable, what with needing to market a business and eventually a book.... and, goodness knows, talking to adults on Facebook is sometimes the only adult conversation I partake in ALL DAY.  Wrap your mind around that, lovelies.  The witty repartee we have about coffee obsession, Johnny Depp, creepy things people do with placentas, etc.  Sometimes that's all I got.  The rest of my day is full of talk of Legos, Angry Birds, chocolate milk, and the multi-faceted use of the word "poop".  Okay, so maybe my so-called adult conversation isn't that big of a step...

It's about balance, of which I have little to none.  Balance in my doula life, and balance in listening to clues while stuffing my face, and balance in social networking.  It's a good lesson to learn, and I hope you'll bear with me as I figure it out.

Especially if it means fondue.

2 comments:

  1. I was just thinking you'd been awfully quiet on FB and wondered if you were at a few really long births or something. I understand taking a FB break, but I hope it's not for long. I haven't met a yooper with a great sense of humor yet, so I really rely on you. Pretty sure everyone up here thinks I'm an oddball and I haven't even brought out any of the placenta jokes yet : )

    Balance is hard for me too. I either do it 150% or I don't do it at all. Feast or famine baby.

    If you need anything, I'm here. BTW, Philippians 4:13 was my confirmation verse

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  2. It was just starting to get on my nerves a little, though I did spend some time on there last night when I was at that postpartum job. I've posted a couple things on there today (links to blog posts, mostly), but I need to maintain some distance, I think, to get anything done.

    Thanks for your offer, too!

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